To Love A Ghost

The way some people look some days
The way some people laugh
The delicate lines that form above their cheek bones
The gentle smile upon your brow
All of these
are things that bring you here despite
what has come to pass.

They grace my life but for an instant
And I cannot hide the tears i weep
That sweet-bitter moment I look upon
Your memory standing
out of reach.

The way she picked up a single pea pod
And nibbled at it bit by bit.

The way he calls me “kiddo”
And how the lump in my throat lifts.

The way someone telephones and says hello,

And how the morning bird’s song sings.

And because i know that i can never have you back
i cling to these and fill the spaces where i lack.

While the city blossoms with crocuses and lust
New life takes its place
The vernal equinox,

I search for you in the unknown reluctant to observe
What stands before me: a stranger’s curious face
And find my self holding in your stead
a hollow ghost in my embrace.
______________________________________________________
christina adamko
19 april, 2011.